My First Result as PGT (2019-2020)

Evaluation makes us all nervous.  As students we all experience the anxiety and fear of impending results, especially the board exam results.  But to have experienced it again as a PGT (my first result of CBSE board exams was declared yesterday , 13th July 2020 - my result, because in a way your students' result is a testimony of your effectiveness in the class!) was an altogether different experience. 

The moment i got to know that the result has been declared,  chanting a silent prayer (i was dead nervous myself )I sent a good luck message to my students' whatsapp groups. Those moments of silence, when students were busy trying to get their result, were like ages - scary, haunting.  In fact, i don't remember being that nervous for my own result as a student,ever.  Time and again i picked up the phone hoping to have got a message from my student telling me his or her score.  But the wait was a hauntingly long one. Not that i doubted my students' abilities but that i wished to know if all the sincere work we had put in was favored and to what extent could I make my students realize their potential.

 The CBSE site was a bit slow and that made the hearts beat a little faster.  Slowly the messages started pouring in.  A tinkle here and a message there, the phone kept ringing the entire day - students elated over their good scores, students overjoyed because they never expected to do so good, students who were a little disappointed that they could have done better, students worried because their result couldn't be seen because of technical glitches, students looking for a word of encouragement in their battle to download their result.  Students thanking me for what they did themselves !! O yes, i mean OK, i was there in the classes with you  but you were the ones in the exam rooms !!! Messages flooding my inbox that the classes had been so much fun and that they will miss me.... 

Suddenly it dawned on me that the sculpting of these children's personality was over ..that i could do no more and that they are now ready to embark on their own journeys.  Unlike my results as a TGT, whereby i could see them being groomed for another two years before they left school, here i am wishing them good luck for their journey ahead -  a journey in which they will now discover themselves, journey which would take them into the world of grown ups - to become one of them.  

Mixed feelings - anxiety now, not of their scores but whether i have given them all i could have that would help them in their journey ahead.  

Yes.... i too would miss u all but i would light up every time one of you would ring me up to tell that you got admission into that coveted course, or that you have learnt this new thing, or that you are going abroad for this course or to that university, or that you  have cleared that big exam or that you have cracked that interview.  Your success will light up my day and bring a smile to my face.

Most of all I would light up when years down the line, one of you would call me to say - "Ma'am we still remember what you taught us and we miss those English classes".

 

Remember learning books isn't important .. .. learning the lessons books teach us is important .... i just hope i have taught you well.

Every phase in life is bound to teach us something valuable.  But it depends on us whether we analyse the lessons or just turn the pages.

All the best to all my students of 12 A and 12 C, the world is waiting for you....

Jyoti Sharma

PGT English

KV Yol. Cantt.